The Truth About Cats and Dogs in Black and White

Truth is just one person's reality. Here is mine in black and white (maybe some shades of gray). This blog has little to do with Cats or Dogs - just humourous sarcastic antics about my life or occasionally, someone else's. You know, intercepting volleyballs with my face, egg dropping, etc. The truth has seen some changes and in fluidity with change expect to see more artistic expressions posting up - so give your two cents worth!

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Pretty Jill

Unknown 11:49 p.m. | permagrin | 3 cents worth |

Walking Industrial Military Complex

Sorry, I just love that excerpt! One month into the western year is a good time to check on the progress of my "resolutions" I think it is perhaps wise to create a short list of 10 things to be completed by the end of February. You can link to my new years post:

Do-See-Learn-2006-Goals

Complete Chapters One and Two (due this friday)
Departmental Presentation Feb 24th.
Pilates twice a week every week in February
Complete Chapter Three (due Feb 17th.)
Finish the Lotus painting
Go to the Dentist
Chiropractor, Chiropractor, Chiropractor!
Finish Ethan's book up to Summer 2004
Party Feb 10. (pretty sad this is a planned event)
Finish last summer's reporting (don't judge me!)

Unknown 1:25 p.m. | permagrin | 5 cents worth |

Recruiting Rats and Monkeys

THE DRAGON

The Dragon is a creature of myth and legend. A symbol of good fortune and sign of intense power, the Oriental Dragon is regarded as a divine beast. In Eastern philosophy, the Dragon is said to be a deliverer of good fortune and a master of authority. Therefore, those people born in Dragon years are to be honored and respected - pay attention. Dragons are the free spirits of the Zodiac. Conformation is a Dragon's curse. Rules and regulations are made for other people. Restrictions blow out the creative spark that is ready to flame into life. Dragons must be free and uninhibited. The Dragon is a beautiful creature, colorful and flamboyant. An extroverted bundle of energy, gifted and utterly irrepressible, everything Dragons do is on a grand scale - big ideas, ornate gestures, extreme ambitions. However, this behavior is natural and isn't meant for show. Because they are confident, fearless in the face of challenge, they are inevitably successful. Dragons usually make it to the top. Too much enthusiasm can leave them tired and unfulfilled. Even though they are willing to aid when necessary, their pride can often impede them from accepting the same kind of help from others. Dragons' generous personalities give them the ability to attract friends, but they can be rather solitary people at heart. A Dragon's self-sufficiency can mean that he or she has no need for close bonds with other people.

The most powerful and lucky Signs of the Chinese Zodiac, its warm heart makes the Dragon's brash, fiery energy far more palatable. This is a giving, intelligent and tenacious Sign that knows exactly what it wants and is determined to get it. Dragons possess a certain natural, charming charisma that ensures they can always influence their peers and often find themselves the center of attention in social situations. Dragons are considered to be very lucky in love! HA! The Dragon's friends are always keen to hear what this firebrand has to say and when it comes to dispensing advice, the Dragon has the floor. Its ego can get in the Dragon's way, but even so, this creature has a knack for initiating projects and keeping the troops motivated. According to Dragons, it's their natural born right to lead the way -- who else could do it so surely and so well? As lucky as they are, Dragons have a good chance of achieving considerable material wealth during their lifetimes, although money isn't this Sign's main motivation. Power is what the Dragon wants and believes it deserves.

A weakened Dragon is a sad sack, a creature that refuses to take defeat with even a modicum of grace. Crossing the Dragon is never a good idea -- this beast can singe! A valuable life lesson for this clever creature would be to absorb the principles of flexibility, compassion and tolerance. Being high and mighty can serve to inspire others, but it also keeps Dragons from living their lives to the fullest. Dragon people are the most eccentric, they can be stubborn, passionate, excitable, honest, and brave, wear purple and walk barefoot in public fountains. Dragons are capable of doing great work for mankind and they inspire trust in almost everyone. The Dragon symbolizes life and growth and is said to bring the five blessings: harmony, virtue, riches, fulfillment and longevity. Chicken Soup and Bamboo Shoots are among keys to even greater good health! Naturally.

WATCH OUT YOU DON"T GET SCORCHED!

The ones born in the year of the fire-dragon are the most extroverted and demanding of dragons. They demand too much of their surrounding and use to much pressure. They can inspire big crowds and are very objective in their critical opinion. These people can build great empires if they learn how to deal with their less good sides a little better. Downright electrifying, Fire Dragons breathe vigor and power. These natural leaders smile at adversity, and turn complainers into optimists. Because they care so much about people, Fire Dragons like to support charitable causes and bring friends together for elegant evening soirees, well duh. These Dragons are fired with ambition, unflagging enthusiasm, and intelligence and enjoy most impressive careers as a result. They're pretty lucky, too! As for themselves, they ooze charisma and never need anyone to fix them up never, no never. Successful in love, often placed on pedestals, Fire Dragons are attractive and have fire in the belly what does this mean?

The Fire Dragon is a powerful force to be reckoned with. The Fire Dragon can move from calm and collected to combustible in a matter of seconds. The Fire Dragon is his or her own worst enemy. These Dragons cannot help feeling they are valuable and all-knowing i do actually. When they are right their vehemence and vigor is an asset to the cause, and though they value objectivity, they do not always employ the best decision-making measures, and sometimes jump to the wrong conclusion. When they do keep their temper, emotions, and rivaling spirit under control, they emanate a commanding influence on other people. The spark of the Fire Element applied to the wick of the Dragon Sign emphasizes many of the Dragon's less socially acceptable habits, such as arrogance, condescension and a domineering attitude -- making the Fire Dragon a walking military-industrial complex my favourite image so far. Possessed of boundless strength and energy, dragons have a streak of courage that is generally the product of an inability to imagine any negative consequences that may result from their actions.

SEXUAL ASTROLOGY

Dragons are filled with kindness and have a huge hearts. They are loyal to just about anybody - sketchy. Dragons are very sexy and charismatic. They can be flamboyant at times and seem bossy. Dragons are the future leaders of the world. Dragons often are center stage in social and romantic situations. Others can perceive you as being a bit over-demanding and selfish at times. Be careful of always acting entitled to attention and adoration as this can backfire. The Dragon’s irresistible charm attracts many admirers secret ones? You need to be aware of your extremely high expectations from a lover. You want a partner to be fascinated with you, to honor you and give you the love you deserve. You will either marry very young or forever be happily single the train has left the station! The final choice will always be up to the Dragon.

Best match/sex: MONKEY and RAT

Worst nightmare: DOG
Hours ruled by the dragon : 7-9 AM This must be a mistake.
Season and month : Spring - April
Point of the compass : East - Southeast
Mentality : Positive debatable.

Unknown 12:32 a.m. | permagrin | 3 cents worth |

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Gong Xi Fa Cai

You don't post for a couple days and people start throwing stuff around getting all rowdy and nonsense. Just Kidding. Well it is a special day, I'm sure Google already enlightened you all. Happy Lunar New Year! It's really no secret that I am a bit more in tune with cycles of the moon than the sun... for multiple reasons. Being a Fire Dragon, I am not very compatible with Dogs, at least the lunar astrological kind, which doesn't necessarily project a stellar year for me. You may find one of many projections at this site:

Chinese Astrology

Here is a subjective cut/paste selection of what I have to look forward to (I went back and highlighted the parts I found most, well, interesting or amusing):

OVERVIEW: You'll devote much of your time and energy to the task of bringing to a successful conclusion the projects that you have your heart set on, but some unexpected obstacles will slow down their progress and put your patience to the rough test. Also, you'll often be set against yourself, for you will have too much ambition and will forgive yourself no weakness or shortcoming. Try to be less tense and you'll be promptly rewarded, as this year the stars will greatly favor patience and tenacity. Casual encounters may very well end up as profound friendships. These relationships will prove most interesting to you since, apart from their sentimental aspect, a common intellectual research will give your exchanges a non-conventional character that will delight you. Remember that 'friendship doubles joys and reduces sorrows by half' (Francis Bacon).
FIRE DRAGON: Savor pleasure fully as it comes along, however transitory it may be: That's the philosophic stance you will adopt this time, and you'll be determined to enforce it in all fields. In love, particularly, you'll show no desire to ask yourself unnecessary questions.
LOVE: First quarter - Your love affairs will tend toward stability; but this won't prevent you from living a more intense sentimental life... As for single people, a change may prove very favorable and based on a stable and serious union. Second quarter - The love affairs that you may have will be passionate, zealous and clearly nonconformist; but they do not seem made to last. Third quarter - The star Hoa Khoa will station himself in a sign in harmony with yours. This way the goddess of love will awaken your sensuality and greatly increase your power to charm. This period will prove particularly favorable if you're single; a very important encounter is possible and even probable. Fourth quarter - planet Long Duc will bring you luck in all areas of life. But it's your love affairs that will first profit by the good influxes... Above all it's single natives of the sign who'll profit by this celestial influence that promises them a first-rate encounter. Singles: Open your eyes; amorous happiness could befall you in quite a casual way!
CAREER: First quarter - Numerous planets will favor your professional expansion. The stars Thien Dong and Nguyet Duc will awaken your ambition. The stars Pha Quan and Long Duc will give you the support of chance. And the star Thien Viet will incite you to see your ideas and projects through... even though nothing important is happening right now, remain confident that everything is evolving in your favor. Second quarter - The star An Quang in beautiful aspect will persuade you to devote much more attention to your career and professional projects than before. This astral movement will allow you to exploit all your potential to its best and will grant you the support of exceptional chance. Those of you who want to reorient themselves or to carry out a more independent and more creative activity should take the plunge; you'll have every chance to succeed. Third quarter - The star Thien Khong will awaken your desire to organize your professional life as you please and to reach your dearest personal goals. On the other side, the planet of chance and success, Long Duc, will help you avoid all possible pitfalls. Fourth quarter - There'll be in your career a turning point that you expect and fear at the same time. This time, thanks to the benevolent presence of Dao Hoa, the changes imposed by Van Xuong will be carried out smoothly. The support from a friend should smooth the progress of your new direction.

Doesn't sound too bad? Slightly thwarted by the "unexpected obstacles" Nice doggie...

Unknown 1:53 a.m. | permagrin | 6 cents worth |

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Narrow Escape

Once again, too little, too early. The free ticket to snowapalooza was waved in anticipation...but it as morning approached it was quickly snatched away by the evil weather office gnomes. Now the snowblower did get to see a little action but so did the city get up and go to work, school, and whatever else these people do. Which raises an interesting question, and an additional "con" to a previous post regarding my decision to work from home. If you work at home, are you still entitled to snow days? A question that narrowly escaped resolution in the early morning hours, not that I was conscious at the time. Well it may not be a snow day and I may have a deadline tomorrow but you can definately find me at home in superman fleece PJs.

Unknown 11:22 a.m. | permagrin | 7 cents worth |

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Submit statement of interest here

So much for not posting. This one comes after a sad realisation. I need a research assistant. I can not pay you what you are worth. There are no benefits. And it will probably only be 1 1/2 weeks. Pay: modest, negotiable, may involve free meals, free movie rentals, artwork, gifts, and armsloads of admiration and gratitude. Hours: flexible. Duration: Jan 26-Feb 3. Chance of extension. Fully-loaded photocopy card provided. Use with caution.

Statement of qualifications:

Must be pretty and smart
Must be local and a friend of mine
Must be witty and have experience in research and knowledge of peer-reviewed journals
Must know what a library is, where the QEII is located and how it works
Must have internet access and online journal know-how
Must be willing to work for extremely charming and generous boss

Unknown 1:47 p.m. | permagrin | 8 cents worth |

Fear and Loathing in Newfoundland

This is a beauty post by my dear Laurie. Just guess who these pickles came from...

Everyone's a critic: Fear and Loathing in Newfoundland

Unknown 11:40 a.m. | permagrin | 2 cents worth |

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Relative Hiatus

Now I don't want to alarm anyone but I may be a little scarce until the weekend. Oh wait, there I go thinking the world revolves around me and my little blog. Seriously, I have a chapter due Friday and so far I have accomplished very little. So far this week, I have fit in two v-ball practices and sufficiently busted up my thumb. Previous reports suggested that it was broken, however, said previous reports were highly melodramatic and exagerrated. Just a busted ligament...damn those 15 year old hitters! And I re-arranged my room... again. One of those things I do when I have run out of other methods of avoidance. Now don't fret. I will try to post inbetween writer's block. Maybe I should just think about it like one big blog.

Unknown 11:36 p.m. | permagrin | 1 cents worth |

Monday, January 23, 2006

Vlad does not = Dracula

Dracula's Homepage

This actually Dr. Elizabeth Miller's page. I good source for all things Dracula. Fascinating reading. I strongly aver that the actual historical events from the 15th and 16th century in Eastern Europe are far more interesting and horrifying than anything published by Bram Stoker. Particularly the life of Vlad Tepes (a.k.a. Vlad the III, a.k.a. Vlad the Impaler). There are some great documents to be found at this site. I wouldn't read them before bedtime!

Elizabeth Miller is recognized internationally for her expertise on Bram Stoker’s 1897 novel Dracula – its origins in folklore, literature and history, as well as its influence on twentieth-century culture. She has lectured on the subject throughout Canada (including presentations for the Royal Winnipeg Ballet, the Stratford Festival and CBC-TV’s “Opening Night”), as well as in the United States, England, Ireland, Germany, Poland and Romania.

Unknown 4:47 p.m. | permagrin | 9 cents worth |

Copyright 2002

1. Sock Lady. Raises sheep. Shears sheep. Spins wool. Knits socks. 2. Sighisoara. World Heritage Site. Birthplace of Vlad Dracul, Father of Vlad the Impaler, falsely equated to Dracula. 3. Castle Bran. Exploited icon of Dracula cult culture. Once belonged to Vlad's Grandfather, Mircea the Old.

How about this one? Or was this an obvious living room attempt at 6 am this morning to produce another graphic wonder? Well now I am just being bitchy. How unbecoming. This smile is partly because I was almost there and could see the ridge and partly because I had no feeling in my legs, pain or otherwise. Reaching the summit was quite emotional. I was so a. relieved, b. in awe that I was still alive, c. suddenly very cold, d. overwhelmed with pride.

Unknown 12:31 p.m. | permagrin | 6 cents worth |

Sunday, January 22, 2006

I think I can I think I can I think I can

I feel as though I should retort with something a little more uplifting than the previous post. I am no stranger to the power of positive thinking. And in fact somedays I actually feel like a giant coal-burning train climbing a mountain. That is not to say that I can't climb mountains. I have indeed and incredulously, climbed mountains.

This is me. In my mountain pose on top of Piatra Craiulii, in Piatra Craiulii National Park near Pestera, Romania, an area well known for its spectacular karst topography including fabulous limestone ridges and breathtaking cave formations. I succeeded in the 2236 m climb accompanied by a simple little butterfly, a Eurasian Ringlet or a North American Alpine with velvet brown wings edged with an orange frill. Ok, ok, so its only half the height of Kilimanjaro, but a far more vertical climb. It is however, 3 times the highest point in Newfoundland and the my second highest climb at 806 m. All in all, still proof that one can acheive great heights should one set his or her mind to it. A terrible pun indeed.

Unknown 4:01 p.m. | permagrin | 8 cents worth |

Friday, January 20, 2006

Confessions of a Yo Yo

I had to rename this one. I'm really not that self-loathing. Ok, Here we go. Public accountability, that's what it all about right? That what Harper says after all. Well, this will be the first and only time I listen to him. I have been on a weight roller coast since high school, I have alluded to it before. The scales, horrific invention, I usually don't pay them much attention. But it has little to do with a number than a sense of good health.

General History: Played 3 varsity sports in high school - weight in 1994 = 155. Freshman year, major fat-free dieting, dancing at clubs, weight training (95) lost 10. Next three years in steady relationship (steady, never said healthy) bodybuilding, supplement taking (98) - gain 40. Break up (99) - lost 30. Steady recovery, second degree, frequent clubbing, swimming, pilates (00) - gain 40. New job, pilates, outdoor activity, volleyball, general happiness (01) lost 30. Reasonably platformed. Began master's program, working full-time, full-time student, stress(03) gain 20. New friend in BC, general unhappiness, continued academic and career stress and uncertainty, atkins, 3 hour-6 day a week workouts (04) lost 35. Family moved away, winter in middle of nowhere, snowshoeing, continuation of work and school stress, lonely (05) gain 35. Did you do your math? I know Laurie did (she likes math). 195. Thank god I am a tall and have great hair, HA!

I should mention that my scales are off 5. So that prompts the public confession - crisis situation. Ask me to explain the statistical concepts of reliability and validity sometime. So what will it be this year? My ass can't take much more abuse. And my pants, well my pants can't take much more ass. The outlook is mixed. Drinking and clubbing may be on the rise. School work is progressing and SHOULD be eliminated from the mix this year. Job prospects - if-y at best. Volleyball - dismal but improving. Gym membership is on my list of "resolutions" not fully realised. With any luck I will either move out of province or out of city to secure a promising, meaningul (well-paying career). I think I need help.

Unknown 11:53 p.m. | permagrin | 2 cents worth |

Return of the Justice League

Finally something to report other than politics! Keeping with the theme of late...my own personal superheros are coming home to visit in 83 days but who's counting? My nephew showed little excitement apparently..."why don't they come to Colorado" was his response." Hopefully, he will tire of ski season by then and want to escape the snow - yeah right. Of course, oddly enough, we haven't had any snow accumulation yet (aside: and I was hoping to have my igloo up and running by now)so April may be just the time for a big dumping of wet, heavy, white stuff (nothing powdery about it in these parts). I was joking about the igloo by the way, one of those mythical stereotypes again.

Unknown 12:23 a.m. | permagrin | 0 cents worth |

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Truth, Justice, and the North American Way

In 2002, Winston Churchill won the Greatest Brit Contest. In 2003, Konrad Adenauer won the german version of the contest. In 2004, the CBC followed suit and held "The Greatest Canadian, " nominated and elected by the citizens of Canada. Then the US picked up on the buzz and the Discovery Channell staged its own event. Canadians avered that we were being copied, although the idea had been well established prior to the contest.

These are some of interesting observations. There are many more politicans amongst the greatest Americans, many former presidents. There are many more sports icons amongst the greatest Canadians, mostly hockey or ice sports, with some notable exceptions such as James Naismith who invented basketball. The Canadian list seems to contain more literary contributors and the American list more pop culture icons, some who double and philantropists. Canada also houses a slew of great philantropists and their list. Both list have many musical celebrities. Canada's list of 100 has only 4 persons of visible minorites, while the American list has 16. The greatest Canadian woman, Shania Twain at #18 is shamed by Oprah Winrey, America's Greatest woman at #9. Overall the US has 21 women and Canada has 19.

Also, Alexander Graham Bell appears on both lists - In the top 10 in Canada and in the top 100 in the US. He was born in Scotland. Laura Secord, who appears at # 35 on the Canadian list was born in Massachussets. Albert Einstein, #14 on the American list was born in Germany and lived 15 of 76 years in the US. Both lists have some absurd entries. Pamela Anderson appears at #50 and Avril Lavigne at #40 on the Canadian list while the American list boasts Arnold Schwarzenegger (also not born in the US) and Michael Jackson. Some nominees just add insult to true American and Canadian Heros.

Overlooked are our great conservationists and recreationists: Henry David Thoreau, Edward Abbey, Rachel Carson, John Muir, Aldo Leopold, Monte Hummell, Joseph Lee, J.B. Harkin, Chief Seath, Pierre Dansereau, Mabel Peters, Roger Tory Peterson.

The Greatest Canadians
The Greatest Americans

Unknown 1:52 p.m. | permagrin | 5 cents worth |

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Meet the Cat Day

Meet Pablo. Sometimes referred to as Pan-face, Yoda, Gizmo, Flat-face, Nermal, etc. This is my cat, a short-haired exotic Persian. And no I didn't pay for her, although I have shelled out enough since in medical cat crap. Pablo Picasso, in honour of her rather abstract looking face, is my snobby, little, timid cat. Adorable, she hunts - indoors, weighs 6 lbs on a full stomach, picks up her food with her paw (as she is mandiblely challenged), will move her treats to the "right" place should you put them in the "wrong" location, she could be an olympic shadow chaser, she apparently dreams about being a velociraptor in her next life or was one in a previous life (still hoping that the scar on my forehead will fade). And, regrettably I am one of those horribly annoying persons who speaks to her cat in a completely different and unrecognizable voice than her normal one.

Unknown 2:00 p.m. | permagrin | 7 cents worth |

Death by Volleyball.

15 year-old boys may be the end of me. You might expect a senior ladies team to be well matched against junior high school boys. Well you are wrong. Senior ladies do not remember being 15, alone ooze the energy that is contained in one toe of a 15 year-old boy. Who expected a minature player to hit so hard? Not my forearms. They are black and blue in disgust over the matter. Same time next week. Oh to be 15 again.

Unknown 12:18 a.m. | permagrin | 1 cents worth |

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Truth, Justice, and the American Way. Part One.

This has the potential to be a controversial post. The thing is Americans aren't that bad. In fact, I have met some fabulous Americans in my brief existence whom can quite amply locate the United States of America on a world map. Perhaps I should interject here to say I am a Newfoundlander, the primary target of Canadian sarcastic humour and privy to more stereotypes than you can shake a stick at. So if all Americans believe Noah's wife was Joan, that the Grand Canyon was created only 3000 years ago by "the Great Flood," and can not locate their own country on a world map then I too must be the daughter of a fisherman, collect EI, and sit on my arse all day contemplating moving to Alberta.

Canada, like America has our own breed of stereotypes, eh? I am a proud Canadian, something that I am sure I have in common with Canadians and Americans alike. I chose the above image very purposefully. Superman, defender of truth, justice, and the American way, perched in front of "Old Glory." Guess what? Superman was written by a Canadian. It's not symbolic of a desired merge or anything - let's not jump to the gun to adopt the Amero. Although, after our current election who knows what will become of our beautiful socialist country, after all, the polls are indicating a possible election of mini-Bush. What would be so perfectly suited here is a link to the blissful sarcasm of South Park's "Blame Canada." Now just in case you are not gifted at decoding sarcasm, this is a statement about breaking stereotypes. Every tree has a bad apple, a perfect apple, a few with some dents or bruises, some have fallen from the tree, and some are not yet ripe. Stay-tuned to learn about my favourite Canadians, and yes, Americans.

Unknown 1:31 p.m. | permagrin | 2 cents worth |

Monday, January 16, 2006

Swearing off Men

Now don't look so surprised. It is long overdue since I have been swearing at them or about them for, well, at least 12 years but more so lately. It makes perfect sense that I should just give up. I must have easy target stamped on my forehead. Actually lets go back to the classifieds again but instead of "hire me" this one would probably go something like this:

For rent: one naive and guillable 29 year-old that still looks and thinks as if she is 22. Looking to be objectified, taken advantage of, lied to, cheated on, extraordinarily hurt, etc. If you are this guy, take a number and stand in line.

Now don't get me wrong. I am as independent as they come. Not clingy. Not obsessive. Not jealous. Not eager to wear a pretty little ring. Certainly not eager to become anyones barefoot slave, no offense. But really, a little respect. Is that so hard to find? Trust me, I'm justified in my attack of the oppositive gender, more than justified, compelled even. I'll spare you the ugly, disastrous details. Oh my god, I'm a man-hater. Ugly realisation and about as far from the ugly truth as possible.

Unknown 3:25 p.m. | permagrin | 3 cents worth |

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Rave Reviews are In!

The weekend is finally over. Friday - uneventful. Friday night - hair pulling madness and did you know that men are ridiculous? Saturday - Lazy. Saturday night - downright geography grad craziness. Sunday - stumbled home 6 am. Much later on Sunday - room stopped spinning,wretched myself through a grueling and pitiful volleyball game. No we didn't win. Now, I am believably exhausted. Unfortunately - no strike that - fortunately there are no pictures of my weekend. The mental image of playing the drunkest and most ineffective game of ping pong is quite enough. And I should throw in, I was in Benders, clearly not my idea and for the record, I doth protested way much.

But the high point, well perhaps a close second to the cessation of the spinning room, would have to be a very generous comment made by "The Red Fox." I simply suck up flattery like a sponge stuck above high tide. So of course the words cute and brilliant were delightfully welcomed. Go Me!

Unknown 8:00 p.m. | permagrin | 1 cents worth |

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Gizoogle

Ok...I may have rogued this one off of someone's blog who shall remain nameless. But it was too darn funny to pass up. Laurie, you must Gizoogle yourself. I'm almost in stitches.

Gizoogle

Unknown 12:22 a.m. | permagrin | 2 cents worth |

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

The Red Fox Roams at Midnight

Just a funny random blog I stumbled across. And because I didn't know what "blog this" does on the blogger bar (well now I know) it is posted on my blog. Hope you don't mind girl whose blog this is!

Anyway, I think I am now a random fan of someone else's blog. Laurie, I am Suzi! Ok, ok, I read this blog and thought, damn she is witty and well-written. Thouroughly enjoyable, like a Sophia Kinsella novel. I really think she could write my blog for me as we seem to share the same general resolutions. Although I can definately one-up her on the 5 pounds she found hiding on her butt...more like 20-up her that is.

Now I am thinking I need to rally a fan club together. I used to have one. Well really it was just this one guy who used to chant my name at open mic...what's his name again...damn. It will come to me at some odd time.

The Red Fox Roams at Midnight

Unknown 11:47 p.m. | permagrin | 3 cents worth |

Confessions of an egg dropper

This is a story about the silly things that happen when you get out of bed before your biological clock has given you permission to actually be awake. This rant is brought on by this morning's egg dropping. You see, I like boiled eggs, for energetic people as the egg people say. I actually stumbled across a random blog about a woman's eggs and chicken with pictures which really just made me feel a little guilty really about the whole egg incident but I digress. I didn't just drop the egg. I picked up one egg in my left hand and then reached for a second with my right and then attempted to switch it also to my left to leave my right hand free for other things, except it slipped through my fingertips. I tried to cradle it with my left-egg holding hand, realising that wasn't a particularly good idea, I tried to re-catch it with my empty right hand, which was nearly successful. It was a little like slow motion egg juggling and I'm positive it would have made an amusing spectator event. I didn't break the Yolk!

Other early morning confessions of a well-meaning night-owl:

Yes, I spilled the coffee grinds over your counter monday morning but that is okay as I nearly ruined my coffee by pouring low carb special K in it.
I did leave a cabin party early the next morning wearing a pretty tiara, which I only realised moments before exiting the car to go into a convenience store. What is worse, J5 never said two words, assumed I knew it was on my head.
There has been OJ in my cereal and coffee.
There has been cereal in my coffee and in my OJ.
I have attempted to heat my coffee in the freezer.
I have worn clothes in the shower by mistake.
I have put a variety of beauty products on my toothbrush.
I routinely forget to apply deodorant and now keep it in my glovebox and office.
I have put my glasses on after putting in my contacts and wondered why everything was still blurry.

Unknown 8:44 p.m. | permagrin | 0 cents worth |

Your vote counts! (maybe)

Ok boys and girls. I am having a referendum of sorts. Well I am just plain indecisive and am really looking to justify working in my home office and avoiding the winter blues.

Question: Should Jilly move to her home office to finish her thesis work (versus working in a shared office of 10 at the University)?

Pros

I can wear sweat pants ALL the time, hell I can stay in my pj's if I want.
I do need to focus while writing (stop laughing at me all those former opps girls) - thesis writing is quite a bit different from writing musicals.
Save money on coffee - 1.65$ a day at least!
Save gas and spontaneous lunch spending, important as I still have 4 months to go without salary.
No DSL line to my work computer. Would have to go upstairs to play with high speed toys (that sounds really wrong).
Not affected by room of grad students, the majority of which are not in thesis writing stage.
More likely to want to get out of the house and haul my ass to gym in evening or morning.
No traffic! God I hate traffic.
Ergonomic leather chair with lumbar support.

Cons

6 letters. H E R M I T.
Maybe distracted by other things....free food, tv, bed...
Not as close to faculty...strike from record.
My home office is already quite cluttered.
Hygiene could become questionable.

Add your pros and cons in the comments below along with you vote. YES or NO.

Unknown 1:14 a.m. | permagrin | 1 cents worth |

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Bits and Blog Has Been Retrofitted

I have refurbished my blog for the new year. Same old sarcastic me. New look. No, its not about cats and dogs. Let me know what you think!

Unknown 7:01 p.m. | permagrin | 2 cents worth |

Saturday, January 07, 2006

Employee for Rent

This has been a direly uneventful week. The only thing I really have to report is my general disapproval of cover letters - stressful, full of stretches and exaggerations (for some outright lies), and it is like prostitution, in an equally indignified yet nonsexual manner. Sell myself. That's what people tell you. Well what is the going price on a good, strong, intelligent lass, from Newfoundland? Should I subscribe to a bartering system, take the first offer, or wait for a better offer? Cover Letter - the red book of self-capitalism. My favourite is the government job application.

Dear Human Resources,

I am a Canadian Citizen. I am woman. Me Speak english. Have driver's licence, one outstanding parking ticket. My favourite colour is burnt sienna.... blah blah blah

I mean, how many guys do you know named Jill? Is it not apparent that I chose to write in english, and that it is clearly stated on the application form accompanying my 13 pages of application materials? Canadian Citizen... information promptly available on the application form...

Really, it is a full-time job just applying for a damn job. This week I spent a total of 3 days writing, editing, re-writing and re-editing two, just two cover letters. I am considering simply placing an ad in amongst the business section...

For Sale: One tall and sarcastic potential employee, gracefully turning 30, and utterly digusted by job applications. Motivated, intelligent, and makes superb coffee. Apply within.

Unknown 2:25 p.m. | permagrin | 3 cents worth |

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

DO SEE LEARN - 2006 GOALS

Update - First week of January Update End of January

Las Vegas baby
Pounds gained since high school - 50 (net max); Pounds lost in 2004 - 35; Pounds found in 2005 - 30; So I figure pounds to be lost in 2006 - 35 - I may have eaten 1/2 a box of chocolates last night. Platformed
Complete thesis and obtain MSc with a 4.0 good news the 4.0 is guaranteed, the thesis is only a pass/fail!
Finish Danielle's Scrapbook - CHECK
Hand deliver Ethan's 5th Birthday Book - Progressing nicely
Get a permanent full-time job! - Trying, looking mildly positive
Be a little more sociable - Sorry I forgot to call you back Carol! - Work harder, still needs work
Keep in touch with old friends
Play guitar more - fail
Paint more - fail
Do yoga...almost everyday - fail
Meditate everyday...may sometimes involve lying in bed - wonderfully
Eat less crap - eating more other stuff
Buy a gym membership
Ok, Ok, use the gym membership
Act as intelligent as my IQ indicates I should be
Stop bragging that I am a freakin' genius...just kidding - I am gifted, oops.
Listen to more music - CHECK
Dance more, even while sober - only chair dancing
Do more volunteer work
Update my blog more regularly - CHECK, so far, CHECK
Throw a big turning 30 gracefully party
Turn 30 gracefully
Take better care of my teeth - reminder call dentist today
Take better care of my skin - crap
Smile more
Visit 2 more states
Visit 1 more country
Try to check off another continent
Stand up for myself - improving
Do abs 5 out of 6 days every week - not improving
Figure out what is stuck in my drain - apparently not the drain at all!
Get blue highlights...at some point
Meet Josie - plan in works
Learn how to mix some new drinks
Get my bike fixed and use it
Get a new couch
Read more books for fun - CHECK - Shopoholic finished. Rather stupid character but priceless writing. Loves Sophia Kinsella! CHECK - The other side of the story. Loves Marian Keyes!
Finish the painting - next extracuricular project on the to do list
Do a graphics course
Get certified - HA! I've Already forgotten what I am supposed to get certified in!
First-aid Re-certification
Finish Dad's Family History book
Finish Mom's Family History book
Help Laurie take more risks - CHECK. She did carry two, yes two bowls of salsa and a glass of pepsi while wearing white
Help Carol avoid musicians
Sing at open mic
Avoid doormat syndrome - So far so good. Continued good behaviour
Daydream - CHECK CHECK CHECK CHECK
Love - (Do cats and family count?) - CHECK. See previous comment

Unknown 6:04 a.m. | permagrin | 5 cents worth |

Monday, January 02, 2006

I am socks

You Are Socks!

Cozy and warm... but easily lost.
You make a good puppet.

What Crappy Christmas Gift Are You?

Unknown 11:04 p.m. | permagrin | 3 cents worth |

Rock on!

Your Band Name is:

The Republican Bananas

Band Name Generator

Unknown 10:46 p.m. | permagrin | 2 cents worth |

Celebrating 2005; Welcoming 2006

Well, here we are the three us: Larry, Moe, and Curly. It was an "entertaining" night to say the least.

Resolutions for 2006:
Girl from Ireland - NO MUSICIANS
Laurie - TAKE MORE RISKS
Sheryl Crow- NO MORE PLAYERS

Check out www.everyonecritic.blogspot.com for more about the evening's shirt folding, bar shining, hot dog boy antics, and much more.

Unknown 1:10 p.m. | permagrin | 2 cents worth |

JILLY

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